Okay here it is. I'm just getting it in under the wire. I'll be more timely with these in the future. True there were problems with the screencaps and the layout, but there was another thing that kept me from finishing this recap which was I HATED THIS EPISODE!!!! It was painful to watch and painful to write about. The biggest problem I had with this episode was the Marissa redemption. They have fallen into this trap where Marissa has become the most abhorable character on this show. However since she is one of the main characters they are stuck with her, so to boost her up a bit they give her a storyline where she does something slightly admirable while writing the other featured characters like assholes to make her look good by comparison. Cheap cheap gimmick to bail out a shitty character. They did the same thing on Smallville with Lana, they've done it here on the OC numerous times with Marissa and they are starting to do it on Grey's Anatomy with Meredith. I hate it and it makes me hate a show that does it!
On the plus side we begin to wrap up some horrible storylines as we head into the home stretch towards the season finale. It hasn't been soon enough. This episode focuses on four different story lines featuring Ryan, Seth, Marissa, and Sandy. Instead of doing a chronological recap I'll break it down by character.
Ryan's Story
Ryan has to deal with his upcoming graduation. After some brief bickering and snark Kiki encourages Ryan to go see his Mom in Albuquerque even though Sandy Doesn't;t think it's a good idea. Kiki wins out and shares some really nice mothering moments with Ryan, something we don't see enough of on the show. We really haven't seen enough of Kiki at all this season.



Next morning, Slutty Waitress is all about to bounce with the "let's keep it on the down low" speech. She sees the Graduation tickets and makes a comment how Dawn and her new man are going to fit right in with the Noopsies. She wants the social class disparity caught on film. Bitch! As she leaves, Ryan gets the "I think I'm gonna pull a dick move and not invite my Momma" look. Uh-oh. He calls Seth which pushes him over the asshat side. He's decided to not tell Dawn about graduation. Yeah, whatever, like that ever works!
Ryan gets to the diner and Dawn turns into a puddle. Ryan gets the "Oh snap, i'm a dick!" look on his face. His plan of dickery falls apart in about five seconds since Slutty Waitress has already told Dawn that Ryan was in town and also told Dawn about his graduation to which she accepts the graduation invite before she's even invited. Slutty Waitress has now screwed Ryan twice.

Ryan explains to slutty waitress Dawns pattern of dating drunks who in turn have abuse Dawn and Ryan his entire pre-Cohen life. Slutty Waitress gets all self righteous and tells Ryan that Dawn met new guy in Rehab and he's been sober for 12 years and that he takes care of her and buys her shit. Ryan's like, gee I wish you would have told me that before we had sex! Slutty Waitress offers to drive him to the airport but she has to make a stop on the way. This. Sucks.

Sandy's Story
Sandy and Matt have a brief scene in the forgettable hospital storyline. Matt is convinced he can get, Dr. Griffin, a guy who has already had him beaten to a pulp, to pay for his lost earnings and "pain and suffering" by blackmailing him. Yeah, whatever, like that ever works! Seriously, writers! Quit it y'all! What's next? Matt starts a website for pet supplies? He concocts a scheme to plant a finger in Wendy's Chili? He's going to start dating Marissa? THIS. Sucks.
Sandy meets with Dr. Griffin and tells him to lay off Matt. Dr. Griffin cautions him to stop worrying about Matt and focus on the Kajillion dollars they are going to make on this hospital deal. While you're at it Sand-Man why don't you also focus on your smoking-hot recovering alcoholic wife. Instead you're turning into Darth Sandy or worse Kiki's Dad! I hear that works wonders for a marriage.
Sandy tells Matt to get his happy ass out of dodge. Matt, the dumbass young business exec of the year, says by having incriminating evidence, he holds all the cards. STUUUUPIDDD!!!!
Meanwhile, Kiki with nothing better to do. Tells Sandy she's had enough of his shady business shenanigans and what they really need is a quiet romantic dinner. Sandy agrees and promises her he'll be there...except he isn't...SANDY=DICKHEAD!!!
Matt meets with Dr. Griffin to exchange the money for the evidence. Of course, Dr. Griffin is simply there to take the evidence and beat Matt silly again. Sandy sneaks around the back door takes the evidence out of Matt's car. He stops Matt's planned beating by telling Dr. Griffin Matt was bluffing. Doc and his goons leave. Sandy gives Matt some F.U. money to get out of town.
Meanwhile, Kiki isn't going to stand there with her cheese in the wind. She throws Sandy's dinner in the garbage. Pull out a bottle of wine and clutches it...until she decides against it and pours it out. Sandy comes home, with no dinner, cold shoulder from wifey, marriage in the shitter, but incriminating evidence to store in the safe.
Seth's Story
Okay this is hurting way too much. Long story short. Summer is determined to get to the bottom of why Seth dumped her. She and Taylor decide to set it up to where She and Seth have detention together. Meanwhile, Cohen mopes and sticks to his guns about lying about not getting into Brown.

He does have a change of heart at the end of the episode, but instead of just telling Summer the truth, he enlists Ryan into helping him concoct a scheme to get into Brown. THIS. SUCKS.
Marissa's Story
Blech we return from the credits with F'N Marissa, She's greeted by Volchock who snuck in the house. Julie walks in and gives the first of many verbal smackdowns to Greasy McSlimy. Julie decides this is the week where she actively gets involved in Marissa's life and takes the "Stay the hell away from my daughter stance". Yeah, whatever, like that...oh I give up! Sigh.
The meat of this plot line is that at one of those out of control Newport Beach Public School Surfer ragers at Volchock's, Mean girl Heather is at the party and we see her at first already drunk and stripping and all into one of Volchock's punk-ass buddies.


It turns out punk-ass and his buddies decide to play Casey Jones and start riding that train in a van outside the house. Marissa breaks it up. She runs back to Julie crying. She's the winner of this weeks morality challenge on the OC. Instead of Berkeley Marissa should be admitted into STFU!!! Hate.

Next Epsisode: Anna, I'm-not-trying-to-be-Watts-from "Some kind of Wonderful" is back. Theresa is back with some Baby Mamma drama for Ryan!
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Aight lets see here. First you worked in the word "dickery" that skyrockets the entry to top place. But then you pulled out
ReplyDelete"Slutty Waitress has now screwed Ryan twice"
I don't care how it happens, writing like this is gold, solid 24 carrot gold.
I almost forgot. They're from the OC, they don't take junk like that from nobody, yo.
ReplyDeleteI can't wait for the baby's mamma drama!! Bring it!! My favorite part of this entry is Ryan's story because there are just too many truths and that's the way we roll. Save us from the demons Brother Jim!
ReplyDelete