Survivor: This Isn't Survival ... It's Thrival

It still sucks to be Ravu. They come home from Tribal all emo, even though they voted out Erica and her huge 'fro because they thought she was crazy. Before they go to sleep in their little rock cave (these people haven't even *attempted* to improve their living conditions) Rita asks that at the next challenge, can people please check their egos at the door and *try* to work together as a tribe?

But I still like Yau-Man, even if he loses some points for tonight's first Mr. Obvious statement: "The more we lose the more difficult it is to recover."

Moto feasts on plantains and gets all smug and annoying about how good they've got it. They've got so much stuff, Lisi and Stacy pass the time by painting the floor of their shelter blue. Hope they got it done before the cable guy got there to hook up their NBA Ticket.

Boo is the one who came up with tonight's overly cute title. I think Moto has too much time on its hands.

Earl comes back from Exile Island, but plays the "I dunno" card when his buddies ask him about the hidden immunity idol. He actually doesn't know where it is, but he plans to find out. But I was kind of disappointed that we didn't get to see his reaction to his new wife being voted out.

Michelle tries to make fire with a pair of glasses. This will work if the sun cooperates -- I've seen it done. And she's really cute, asking the sun to come participate in her game, and talking about how her momma doesn't want her to die in Fiji.

And it works! Michelle lights up some coconut husks, then does the Olympic relay back to Ravu's campsite where they make a fire! This is really impressive -- few tribes have managed to do this without help, and Becky and Sundra couldn't make a fire last season with rocket fuel and a blowtorch.

Ravu rejoices, doing the dance of one foot to greet their new fire. Rocky says this is just the kick in the ass they've needed.



Woo-hoo! They've separated the reward and immunity challenges again!

Probst gives Ravu a firestarter as a prize for making fire. Then he explains the challenge, which seems designed to oil up the pretty people and get the girls out of their tops -- way to take the high road, CBS.

The contestants will make their way across a giant Slip 'n Slide, grabbing a numbered ball along the way. At the end of the course, there's a basket. Get the ball in the basket, score a point. First team to six wins its choice of luxury items (like Moto needs any more), fishing gear (like Moto needs any more) or fresh fruit. The winning team also gets to send someone to EI, who *won't* be immune from Tribal -- they'll come back for the immunity challenge.



In the first round, Moto's older guy Gary (Papa Smurf) takes two *nasty* falls -- the kind that make ya wince when you're watching them. But he still beats Anthony.

Dreamz laughed when Gary fell -- I'm beginning to think he needs to be killed for the good of humanity.

Ravu gets a point on the board when Rita bests Cassandra, but loses her top in the process. Boo and Stacy score for Moto too -- and I'm shocked that Boo finished this challenge without losing or breaking something important. Mookie cruises to a win for Ravu -- he's got some athleticism, and could be a hidden challenge threat.

Poor Sylvia falls, then flops around like a goldfish out of its bowl for a good minute. It's sad, really. Liliana scores for Moto. Edgardo scores for Moto. Ravu's hopes rest on ... Yau-Man, who's facing Dreamz. And yeah, little old guy vs. big annoying young guy -- it was a damn funny pairing.

I cursed Dreamz as much as I could from my couch, but it didn't matter -- Moto wins again. They picked the fishing gear, and sent Sylvia to EI for some unknown reason.

Hey Moto? This was the time to send one of the athletic ones to EI -- weaken them before a challenge. Not like it would matter much, but still ... at least attempt strategy.



Actually, the "have and have not" deal is starting to grate on me. Moto has such a huge advantage over Ravu that it's not even funny, and as we all know, foregone conclusions Aren't Fun. Mix it up, CBS!

Sylvia is sad on EI, because she sucked in the challenge and she knows it. At least the clue to the HII says "DIG HERE, IDJIT!!!!" She makes plans to try to grab the idol when she gets back to camp.

At Moto, Gary is having trouble catching his breath after those nasty falls in the challenge -- he might have broken ribs. Cassandra cries, saying that Gary was in such bad shape he didn't know where he was, and that he didn't want to die in Fiji. Umm, doesn't that mean he knew where he was?

Sexy Australian doctor makes another appearance, checks Gary out, and offers some painkillers. Gary opts to stay in the game. Everyone gets their "we're so concerned" moment in the Confessional.

And as much as I like seeing sexy doctor, I've seen him way too much in recent seasons. Suck it up, Survivors -- don't call the medics if you stub your toe. In this instance, it was probably a good idea to call for medical attention, but the next time, I want to see copious amounts of blood, someone who's fallen in a fire or someone who hasn't taken a dump for a week.

At the Immunity Challenge, Ravu cheers when they hear it's a food challenge. Not gonna be steak and lobster, guys -- and if you're cheering for the gross food, you're *really* bad off.



Challenge is simple -- eat gross stuff before the other team. First team to four points wins immunity.

Liliana gobbles a giant clam before Rocky, but gets some stuck in her teeth and Rocky wins the round. Dreamz gobbles an octopus tentacle before Sylvia can finish. Mookie slurps down some peanut worms, and even has time to taunt Lisi and try to get her to hurl. Moto gets pissy about Mookie's "unsportsmanlike behavior," and says that it will destroy their goodwill towards Ravu -- no charity baskets for them! Moto wins the next two rounds.

Ravu's fate lies with Anthony, who's completely grossed out by pig snouts. He cries and doesn't even finish a bite, while Papa Smurf downs the snouts like it was a couple of strips of bacon. Ravu wins Immunity again.

Anthony bitches about not having spit to swallow, but he took a big swallow of water right before he went up to the table. He couldn't handle the ick factor.



Ravu pouts because they lost again. Rocky calls his tribe the biggest bunch of losers that's ever appeared on "Survivor," but they are far from that. Anyone remember StephaME-ME-ME and Bobby Jon?

Mookie's pissed that Anthony can't handle a pig snout, and wants to vote him out. Rocky, who wants Sylvia gone, wisely suggests secondary votes against Anthony just in case she has the HI.

I can't believe I just typed "Rocky" and "wisely" in the same sentence.



Rita says she's going to vote how she wants, and not for Sylvia or Anthony. Sylvia searches for the HI, but she's hindered by the fact it's buried right smack in the middle of camp. She digs a lazy hole, but I think Yau-Man was on to her.

At Tribal, Mookie calls Anthony out for being a lousy pig eater, and Anthony damn near cries again. Sylvia apologizes way, way too much for sucking at the Reward Challenge. Everyone agrees life at Rauv blows chunks.

Before Jeff reads the votes, everyone gives Sylvia meaningful looks, but she doesn't have the HI, and she's going home.

Sorry Sylvia -- I didn't have anything against you, but it will be nice if your tribe stops bitching about how bossy you are.