Thursday, August 02, 2007

So You Think You Can Dance: The Top Eight

Aight suckas, I've tried to change my trifilin' ways but I'm back on the So You Think You Can Dance train. It's been a fun, but predictable season so far, which is one of the reasons I've stayed away. What they should have called this show was So You Think You Can Dance Around a Conflict of Interest. During the audition shows there were certain contestants with quite a bit of clout that were chosen for the show. Not surprisingly they all made it to the Top Ten. Now that the judges are removed from the elimination process and the decisions are all made by "Ameriker", I feel a little more comfortable with the show which at times this season has felt horribly, horribly rigged.

We're left with eight dancers, so I thought I'd give y'all my little rundown on each of them before I go with an actual show recap tonight. The screenies are all at the same point of the solos they performed, and yes, they are all of the dumb as hell "ticking clock move."




She's been one of my favorites this season. I thought she might actually be the first one eliminated this season after her initial disco routine and the fact that arguably she was the least conventionally attractive of the ten girls. I thought she and Dominic had great chemistry and they quickly became the most entertaining couple to watch during the season. She finished in the top three during Top Ten week so she does have a fan base. She has a great energy when she dances and is fun to watch.



He's likable and can do some mean gymnastic tricks. Otherwise, I'm kind of "meh" on this kid. I'm quite surprised that he made it this far.



She's one of the reasons I've avoided getting too invested in this show. From the first cattle call show when they had her brother Benji pimping her I knew we'd be seeing her all the way to the finals. She's been really protected from criticism the entire season. To be fair, she is a great dancer, but there is something so in genuine about her that keeps me from being a fan. What really bugs is when she tries to put on her vamp/sexpot face. Girl, we know a tease when we see one.



Probably the best dancer in the competition and has been called the best male dancer eve on this show. Doesn't matter. He's got such a smug way about him that I want him gone. It's as simple as this test, "Would I pay money to see him perform?". Nope, because he comes off as a prick. He's like the Barry Bonds of this show without the steroids and the gigantic asteroid head.



The token Russian ballroom dancer has got a fan base that has taken him further than I expected. I've enjoyed watching him this season especially in the under appreciated Bird Dance and the impromptu routine with Bette Midler.



Unlike Danny and Lacey whose talent stifles the conflict of interest argument, Lauren has seen the most benefit from the judges favoritism. Her body of work hasn't been impressive at all and she should have been eliminated weeks ago. Her saving grace is that she really is cute. She's got the toothies though and that's kinda annoying.



My favorite male dancer on the show. He's been taking the show your personality advice a little too much to heart and he has had some weak performances, but his breaking skills are unbelievable.



My favorite since the beginning. I love the whole snowboard slacker vibe she carries. The B-Girl thing? I think it's pretty clear she's a trained dancer who decided that she liked breakin' rather than the usual untrained breaker fish out of water we've seen on this show. I dig her so much I'm brining back the term "tenderoni" just for her. Word.

This week our guest judge is Adam Shankman making a return to us this season basking in the glow of Hairspray's opening success. Apparently the film had the highest grossing opening weekend for a musical ever. "Grease" called and said "Whatever".

Instead of one routine and a solo, our dancers will be performing two routines. Danny picks Sara out of the random hat 'o dance and it seems like a mismatch at first if only because Danny is like two feet taller than she is. They start out with the Argentine Tango, otherwise known as the dance where the girl might kick her partner in the nuts.

Sara comes out wearing these awesome leather boots and it might as well be done for me. Winner! The routine was hot and would have been even hotter if Danny weren't so aloof and/or homosexual. They decided to spotlight Danny with several spots. While Sara was fanning her tenderoni self Danny would do some pirouettes here, some pirouettes there, and busts out with a flip for good measure.

After Shankman gives out even praise highlighting Sara's transformation from B-Girl to complete dance and Danny's centre, Mary and Nigel give Danny a tongue bath. Mary points out that the flip was out of place in a Argentine Tango. Nigel predictably defends Danny stating that since he's able to do a flip like that he should. I wonder if he would have said the same if Dominic broke out a headspin during a quickstep?

Next, Dominic picks Laurens name and first up for them is a Krump routine with Lil C. Dominic is excited that he's partnering with Lauren because she's hot. She also likes to rehearse with her breasticles popping out of her shirt too. So yeah, she's scoring points with me.


What we get is the most laid back Krumping I've ever seen. It seemed to be just another hip hop routine and it was just okay. I think I could have done this routine The highlight was Lauren falling when she was supposed to be jumping off of Dom's back.

Shankman still calls it "hot". Mary thought they lost energy but they were still "gangsta". Nigel thought the 50 Cent track killed it because the song meandered. He complimented Lauren covering the fall. I had to watch it twice to see what was wrong with it. They just didn;t hit the moves hard enough. The jerkiness was there and there was enough in movements to really get fierce but it didn't happen.

Neil gets Lacey and their first number tonight is Latin Jazz. The rehearsal bit focuses on the "Crunch" lift that Neil will have to do with one arm while Lacey curls up in a ball. Really all that time is set up for whether or not they pull off the lift.

They start out dancing to a really saucy number. Neil solidifies his hold on the tween vote by performing shirtless. This had the potential to be really steamy but they come off as two smiley kids mugging for their parents in the crows every chance they get. The lift? Neil does it but uses two hands. I guess the gun show was closed.

Shankman thought they weren't into each other. He has the nerve to individually criticize Lacy for looking out into the crowd too much. She reacts by putting on her bitch face the rest of the session. Mary thought the chemistry wasn't there at all to a round of boos. She also thought Neil wasn't looking at her enough even though the replay is questionable. Nigel compares them to two dance pupils at a recital.

Our final couple is Pasha and Sabra and they start out with Broadway. Tyce D'orio guides them through a fast paced rehearsal and Pasha and Sabra joke about their communication problems. Odd, they are two of my favorites but when they come together it just seems so bland.

Okay the dance is set to "A Wild Party" and if you imagine all the moves you would see on a Broadway stage during a part scene ...that's pretty much all you get. It's fun but its pretty much a two person hoedown.

Shankman loves it and calls Sabra a revelation. Mary gets Pasha's back and calls him a revelation too. She loved and does her scream bit. Nigel compares them to Benji and Donyelle doing "You Can't Stop the Beat". He gives them the ultimate jinx saying they will be there next week.

OMG the teaser shows Danny and Sara in matching airbrushed shirts! Flashback to 1987 yo! Yeah those outfits are pretty much dead on. Just because it's retro doesn't mean it's a good idea. I remember wanting an airbrushed shirt that said "Rock N' Roll Express" back then. It doesn't mean I should wear one now. This is a Shane Sparks joint, yo.

The coreography was straight out of the late 80's and was perhaps too authentic for anyone that didn't remember those times. All they needed was a Roger Rabbit. Sara is totally in her groove while Danny is looking alot like Carlton Banks. Methinks this routine was dumbed down quite a bit for him.


Anyway the jidges harp on the wardrobe a little too much. Mary thought it didn't hit hard enough. Nigel somehow blames Sara for being better than Danny and felt she should have come down to meet his partner. Yeah Sara it's your fault Danny "the greatest dancer of all time" sucked the big one in this routine. This is the bullshit I've been talking about. Really really hate this show right now. Just give Danny and Lacey the top 2 and y'all can lick them to death.

Lauren and Dom come back with a Rumba for their second dance. Lauren is all about the sexy while DOm hams it up quite a bit. Looks like this could get a bit steamy.


Yeah they did a Rumba and they kissed at the end. It's a SYTYCD first. The dance itself was just kinda blah for the most part. Shankman gives them props for their chemistry. Mary thought it was too much posing. Nigle wants to remind Ameriker how sexy Lauren looked in her dress. Seriously Nigel, remember when you said that you would be in danger of favoritism accusations when it came to Lauren? Didn't think so. HATE.

Okay here it comes the Mia Michaels backstory routine. She give Neil and Lacey the roles of her and her deceased father reuniting in Heaven. Talk about shielding your dancers from criticism.


Okay I admit it was touching, but they could have played hopscotch in that setting and it might have had the same results. The worrier and accident watcher in me kept thinking that Neil and Lacey were going to slip on all those flowers.

Shankman calls it the greatest dance ever on television. Mary is too choked up to do anything but draw a heart in the air. Nigel said it was the most touching thing he's seen -ever. Okay trophy engraver that's Schwimmer with two M's

They really stuck it to Pasha and Sabra here. Not only to they have to follow most equally sentimental-hyperbolic routine ever. They also have to do the quickstep!


Anyway as far as quickstep goes it was actually entertaining. The judges gave Sabra and Pasha props as the most consistent duo of the night.

Okay let's recap. Objective status? Protect Danny, brother of Travis? Check, they didn't point out his shortcomings in the hip hop routine. Protect
Lauren, student of Tyce D'orio? Check, we reminded everyone that she was hot. Protect Lacey, brother of Benji, cousin of Heidi? Check, routine two was impossible to criticize.

This is all playing out like it's supposed to. I'm sorry I came back.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Paj,

All I can say is, it hasn't been the same without you. Every week I forget how angry I am by Wednesday evening, only to be reminded by the crazy jidges. (By the way, Kat, the joke was old 3 episodes ago.)

Now because I was entrenched in 24-hour bridge collapse coverage, I didn't get to see this episode. However, I have a feeling my sentiments were pretty exactly represented here, except for one thing: it is really, really not fair that Sabra is that incredible after only 4 years of dancing. Thankfully she has stopped trying to be a comedian, and I can enjoy cheering for her again. When I'm not blinded by jealousy, that is.

Whatever. Paj, you need to keep writing so that Ameriker understands what a sham this has become. While the dancing is MUCH better than last year, I'm sick of all the tongue baths.

Out,
Rizzle

Anonymous said...

Much better Rizzle?
We haven't seen a decent krump session since last year. Everything in wednesday's episode was blah and terrible. I didn't eveng et to see Lacey shimmy in knee high boots like normal :(

You'd think they would get better as it goes on, but no.

I equate this to when we lost Hok *sob*