Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Celebrity Duets - Sorry, I just can't do it.

Like I said earlier in the week, I'm really not sure if I can fully commit to a full run of Celebrity Duets. Still the Tuesday night Fox reality show time slot has been good to Tortilla Chips and Milk, so instead of diving in for the full recap treatment...let's test the waters a little.

Okay the concept here is celebrities who are not known for singing pair up with "music legends". Waitaminit, Chris Jericho actually is the lead singer for the Metal Band Fozzy, Queer Eye Jai and Alfonso Ribero have Broadway experience, Cheech often had to carry a tune in the Cheech and Chong days and sang the "hit" Born in East L.A., Lea Thompson sang with Howard the Duck, and Lucy Lawless once rocked the National Anthem so hard her boobies popped out of her dress. So more than half of these celebrities actually can carry a tune, what fun is that?

Our host is Wayne Brady, who is probably gonna belt out a tune before the season is over. Since this may be the only recap of the show I'll just get this out of the way now: "Is Wayne Brady gonna have to choke a bitch?"

We of course HAVE to have our three judges. The first is Marie Osmond, who if you think about it is the bizzaro Randy Jackson. Our incoherent Paula Abdul is...Little Richard? Yes! Mashed potatos, gravy, and cranberry Sauce, wooooooooooooooooooo! Our "Simon" is David Foster, who did a wonderful guest turn on AI as an asshole, gets to be an asshole here.

We start out with Lucy Lawless, who really looks mmm mmm fine! Maybe I should start watching Battlestar Galactica? I was really hoping for a the Xena battlecry... I never get what I want. She starts singing "Time, Love, and Tenderness" and the trend of Paj not getting what he wants continues when Michael F'N Bolton comes out as her duet partner. Michael F'N Bolton... Okay that's it I'm done! Really i can't do this. Nothing to make fun of, people I hate taking up my time, No way!!! This is not how the TC and M rolls, yo! Yadidimean? Forget this show, Let's get Super Hyphy yo! Here's Keak Da Sneak. I'm out!


P.S. Yes this is TOTALLY because Chris Jericho got jobbed!

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5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wait no don't leave me hanging like that!!!

What song did Jereicho sing?
Did he cover Good Vibrations?

Did anyone get the Walls?!!?!

and I really like Wayne Brady, you shouldn't make fun of him.

Andrew McAllister said...

Hey Paj, ERizzle and Fyre,
Thanks for including me in your blogroll. I truly appreciate it!

Have a great one!
Andrew
"To Love, Honor and Dismay"

ERizzle said...

Never fear. Nip/Tuck is coming, and it's bringing with it "the filthiest 15 minutes of TV ever." Just one more week of garbage, Paj, just one more week...

Hell, I'M beginning to miss Allison.

Paj said...

sigh...Allison...

DrWan said...

"Ooh, That made my big toe shoot up in my boot!"